Conflict: A Path To Peace?

When I was young and innocent, I used to pray for the end of conflict. I don't care whether it was something as small as a fight with my friend or something bigger as Tibet's struggle to freedom.
For me, conflicts were nasty. It brings out the worst in people. And personally for me,  conflict makes me feel distressed and unhappy.

Over the years since then, my definition of conflict has evolved. From a limited and linear perspective, I have started to see conflict as something circular, dynamic and maybe, even not so bad.

 I went to united world college three years ago. In the beginning,  I was overwhelmed by the diversity of the community. People from so many countries, speaking such different languages, with values and culture distinct and unique, how can I possibly imagine all of it in my mind, leaving understanding behind? How can I live in a place where there is only one person who speaks Tibetan? I worried at nights about the decision I made and the life I chose.

Only God would know that my two years in UWC was to become a turning point in my life. Within those two years, I was continuously challenged by the difference of the community. I started asking myself lot of questions. I started rethinking about the values and beliefs I have. Our difference helped us grow and learn from each other. In the process, it was inevitable that we had "conflicts". Conflicts of interest in room, Conflicts of politics with Chinese. Conflicts of Culture and what not. If I gave up during those times, I would have missed the best part that came afterwards. What happens after the conflict matters. Alot.

Because, despite all the differences I had, I came away learning to appreciate the potential and energy of diversity. Living with such diverse people taught me that difference in itself is not necessarily a bad thing, it is the light in which you look at it and the actions you take on how to handle it.

My first academic definition of conflict was the ABC triangle. Different attitude leads to different behavior which in turn leads to contradiction. Most people thought that yes, this is what conflict is. The end. I did too.

But I realise, with time and tide, like many other important things in life, conflict is more of a process rather than an end.Through conflict, we learn, we grow and we live. When there is difference, there is so much potential to grow because people are always challenging you to think, reflect on why you think the way you do. Conflict in some sense makes you introspective, it makes you ask new questions to old beliefs. And maybe, at the end, this journey will lead us to true peace and pure joy.